Breastfeeding- A Fact of Life

Warning: This post is somewhat controversial; however, everyone is entitled to his or her own opinion and I am just expressing mine here.

A few weeks ago, while attending Sunday Mass with my family, my little girl let out some little shrieks letting me know she was hungry…Now. So like any good mom, I prepared to feed her.

I glanced over in the direction of the nursery only to notice that this particular Sunday the room was full of little children running around.

So I’m faced with two options: feed her in the church pew (completely covered up, let me add) or let her go hungry and scream her lungs out interrupting everyone’s experience.

I opted to feed her.

My darling husband grabbed my nursing blanket and helped baby H and I get situated. All was going well and everyone was happy…Or so I thought.

The offering was the next part of the mass and my church has a custom of passing the collection basket from one individual to another. I turned to hand the basket to family behind me and was greeted with a very dirty look from the mother. If that was the only thing that happened, I may have chalked the incident up to an accident; however, during the spread of peace, she refused to acknowledge or look at me.

I understand breastfeeding makes some people awkward. To be completely honest, those who feed without covering up even make me feel  uncomfortable. Nevertheless, us mothers should not have to deprive our children or go hide in a corner to provide our children with food. That’s not right.

Personally, I put that cover on so you and I, both, don’t feel uncomfortable. Feeding my baby underneath a blanket or cover is not the easiest task in itself. My view of my baby is obscured and many times she gets too warm. It would be so so so much easier to feed her uncovered.

When a person makes snide comments or gives dirty looks to us breastfeeding mothers, it lowers our confidence in our ability to mother. And hey, this job is hard enough as it is.

So, cut us some slack. We’re only trying to make everyone happy.

 

 

 

 

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Deviating from the Border

Are you a “color inside the lines” or “outside the lines” kind of person and which one would you rather be?

This question was posed on me this morning as I reflected back on this week’s happenings, which included finalizing my journey to become a stay-at-home mama! (YAY!!)

Anyway, most of my life I have definitely been a psychology textbook definition of a type A personality—I colored with very predictable colors neatly inside the borders. I was the very predictable, good girl growing up. My aspirations included obeying the rules, getting straight A’s in school, following the cool crowd, and sticking to carefully planned out life goals.

I thought I was destined to be a physical therapist since I was in middle school. My ultimate plan included being accepted to my dream college, graduating with honors, and going on to get my doctorate.

Little did I know that my dream college ended up not being a good fit for me, I wouldn’t graduate with honors, and I was rejected from every physical therapy school I applied to.

And while this may sound really depressing, I’m here to say that my best memories have happened since I learned it’s okay to color over those suggested borders.

I have experienced the true joy of marrying my soul mate and had two perfect babies with him. Now I’m starting my latest adventure—stay-at-home parenting. (Where everyday involves deviating from that normal, pretty border haha)

As I approach my 25th birthday, I think the biggest lesson I have learned is about the importance of goals, but also the excitement of adventure. In some cases we need to choose the boring blue crayon and follow the set border. But sometimes it’s best to pick the vibrant magenta and color our own path.

Border

Here We Are, Just Playing in the Mud

Transition– The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines this as “a change from one state or condition to another”.

I think a disclaimer with the words “hectic,” “wild,” and “unpredictable” should be added to the definition, but that’s why I’m not in charge of writing the dictionary.  Haha.

Why do I mention this? Well this particular word hits the nail on the head for describing my family at this point in time. Want some examples?

  • B is on his last 11 weeks of college. He’s beginning the transition to college graduate status and the job hunting has commenced.
  • We are planning to move out of my dad’s house around the same time as graduation. We’re slowly transitioning into pack and purge mode.
  • Little H is transitioning to a larger size in clothes and I don’t have any winter gear for her yet.
  • And finally, I’m transitioning from working to stay at home mom, which comes with a whole set of its own transitions! (Whew, two in one sentence!)

Let me just say, none of these changes are easy. Well, shopping for baby clothes may be, but it’s emotionally rough on me to see my two month old growing up so fast!

With B’s 15 credits, full time job, and senioritis hitting its all-time high and my working situation still being sorted out two months after baby H was born (this is a whole other post for some other time…), to say our wheels just keep spinning in the mud would describe it perfectly.

Each time we try to make a decision, we are reminded that something out of our reach is preventing us from moving ahead. And the rut keeps getting deeper…

For the first time in 2 ½ years of marriage positivity hasn’t been the easiest to maintain.

So what has this change in tide taught us so far?

  1. Communicate, communicate, communicate. And then communicate some more.

B and I have found out time and again that when we are not overly clear about something, it tends to get lost in translation. Since we don’t see each other much throughout the week, we both get different ideas and forget to share them sometimes. I would rather mention a topic repeatedly, than forget to say it. (Sometimes I keep a talking list so I remember each of my extremely important topics—this often includes the status of little H’s poos for the day haha)

  1. Be together as a family whenever we can.

B’s school and work schedule leaves weekends somewhat open for us. Yes, he still has homework, but he likes to take one whole day off to spend with H and I. I try to have fun plans lined up for us, like last weekend we went to a pumpkin festival. (I LOVE fall!)

  1. Spend time together just the two of us, too!

After little H falls asleep, the rest of the night is devoted to B and myself. Sometimes we talk and sometimes we just cuddle up and watch Modern Family together. Although it is hard to stop looking at our beautiful daughter’s face, we have realized the importance of the two of us being together without her. I haven’t quite become okay with allowing a baby sitter to watch her for a few hours, but this will be coming in the future.

  1. Pray without ceasing!

Since God is the creator of our lives, doesn’t it make sense that we ask Him for help getting us through this? Right now B and I are working on praying together. This is another way for the two of us to grow closer and really learn what is on the other person’s heart. Personally, I am constantly reminded of my favorite Bible verse: Philippians 4:6-7, which says “Have no anxiety at all, but in everything by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God. Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”

The light is at the end of the tunnel and we are getting a few steps closer to it every day. Until then, all we can really do is let the wheels keep spinning and enjoy playing in the mud rut.